Thinking outside my head.....

I sit here this evening, listening to the hum of our janitors realizing a terrible truth; just how much I hate my job, and that there is nothing I can do about it. Not a dern thing. I mean come on. Where else am I going to find a job that pays as well as I have here in western oklahoma? I'm not, and that is what saddens me the most. I guess the real truth is that I am just down about my finacial situation right now. I'm broke. I'm beyond broke. I'm flat busted and I have no idea what I'm going to do. Everything is on the verge of getting turned off, and I can't pay. I'm trying to get something going with my banker, but I am just so affraid that there will be nothing that he can do. I have to figure something out. But I guess all i can do is trust in the Lord that has sustained me thus far. We've been down before, but not this low. If this keeps up, I'll have to ask my dad for money, and I would much rather have a root canal as do that. But, what are you going to do? Anyway. I just need to blow off steam. This place makes you build it pretty quick sometimes. I just wish there was something more I could do for my family, thats all. I hate being this cruddy with them. Anyway. Till another day.... And a better one at that........

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